Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Beginnings


I always imagined myself to be the type of pregnant lady who would not let things hold me back.
I would be the person who just kept going on with my normal life and enjoy every moments of it.
 This was what I had wanted for so long, why would I start to complain about it?
And don't worry, this is not going to be a complaining post about the woe's of being pregnant...
But when life happens in unexpected ways, you have to start throwing your "ideals" out the window.

We found out we were pregnant when I was 4 weeks along and at 7 weeks the complications began.
Nothing is more horrifying than hearing the doctor tell you that you could loose your baby.
Your miracle baby that you thought you would never have.
And to top that off, the doctors said that there was nothing that could be done to fix the complication.
 We were just left with the instructions to wait, rest, and pray.
Time would only tell if things would get better or worse.

So that is what I have been doing for the past 8 weeks. Yeah, that's almost 2 month.
I've practically been on bed/couch rest, unable to do not much more than read
or watch endless hours of Four Weddings and What Not To Wear (two highly addictive shows).
Emotions swaying from happy to sad, from hope to despair at any given moment of the day.

Not really what I had "planned" my pregnancy to be like.
But everyday that I wake up still pregnant, and as those days turn into weeks,
I praise the Lord that he has given me one more day.
And I pray that these weeks will turn into 40 weeks
and in July the Lord will bless us with a perfect healthy baby.

 I ask that you too stand in prayer with us.
That the Lord will heal the complications and in His perfect timing
give us the baby we truly hope for.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm praying for that baby in your tummy miss Jenn. Every time I think about him or her. Just so you know :)

Elise said...

I'm so happy to pray with you!

Meghan Hill said...

Sweet girl, I found your blog through the Easter shoot post and started reading. I can't imagine what your feeling, always hoping that you don't wake up to something awful. I got pregnant over a year ago when the doctors said its couldn't be done.. And 10'weeks later we lost it. It was awful, the feeling of loss and uncertainty and sadness . I pray that isn't your story and The Lord will bring you and your sweet babe through the fire and bad days. This is my first time here, but know I am in prayer for you.

Meghan Hill said...

I tried to publish my previous comment but I don't know if It went through or not. I am new hwere and found this post. My heart aches for your uncertainty and I can only imagine what your soul is wrestling with. We too got pregnant when they said it couldn't be done and lost our child at 10 weeks. So much uncertainty and pain in that. My prayer is that The Lord delivers you and restores health to you and your sweet babe.